Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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