Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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