Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
