I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
