Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
