Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
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