you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
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