Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
