I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
