Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
