The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
