Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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