and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
