ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
It was confusing and full of hummus
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
