then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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