kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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