Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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