What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
