how do flat chested girls get laid?
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
