he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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