are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
