I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
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