I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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