you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
