Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
