I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
