Sry I called you an 8
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
