champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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