have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
