why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize
