Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
