Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
