There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
