it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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