i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
