I should be sponsored by Trojan
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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