wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
