I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
