so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I am spending my child support on dildos
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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