I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
