these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
