I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Randomize
