Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
