remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
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