Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I don't deserve a penis
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize