So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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