But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
