I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
