i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize
