its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
