I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
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